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Historical moments when the F word was appropriate:

 

1. "Where did all these f**king Indians come from?" - Custer

2. "Any f**king idiot could understand that." - Einstein

3."It does SO f**king look like her!" - Picasso

4. "How the f**k did you work that out?" - Pythagoras

5. "You want WHAT on the f**king ceiling?" - Michaelangelo

6. "Scattered f**king showers my ass!" - Noah

7. “Any chance for a good f**king rain today?" - Joan of Arc

8. "And so who the f**k is going to know?" - Bill Clinton

 

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On Careful Driving:

 

Drive carefully. 90% of the people on the road are caused by accident.

 

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Sexy Gorilla?

 

A zoo keeper offered a passing man $500 to have sex with the gorilla.

To the zookeeper’s amazement the man replied “I’ll do it!”

Great,” the zoo keeper replied, removing the key to the gorilla cage from his key ring.

“But there is one problem,” the man replied.

“Like what?” said the zoo keeper, looking irritated.

Looking at the gorilla cage dejectedly, the man said, “I don’t have $500.”

 

 

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INTERNATIONALISM IN PRACTICE: -- An American soldier in a hospital explained how he was wounded: "I was told that the way to tell a hostile Vietnamese from a friendly Vietnamese was to shout 'To hell with Ho Chi Minh!' If he shoots, he's unfriendly. So I saw this dude and yelled
'To hell with Ho Chi Minh!' and he yelled back,
'To hell with President Johnson!'
We were shaking hands when a truck hit us."

-----(from 1,001 Ways to Beat the Draft, by Tuli Kupferburg)

 

 

 

 

The Chickasaw Plum  -  Volume II - Number 3 - March 2005

 

 

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