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Chickasaw
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Analogies and Metaphors
With appreciation to the Harvard Square Commentary
Every year, English teachers from across the
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Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides
gently compressed by a Thigh Master.
·
His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances
like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.
·
He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like
a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those
boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high
schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those
boxes with a pinhole in it.
·
She grew on him like she was a colony of E. Coli,
and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.
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She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog
makes just before it throws up.
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Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
·
He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.
·
The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated
because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a
formerly surcharge-free ATM machine.
·
The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a
bowling ball wouldn't.
·
McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled
with vegetable soup.
·
From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an
eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and
Jeopardy comes on at
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Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
·
The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when
you fry them in hot grease.
·
Long
separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field
toward each other like two freight trains, one having left
·
They
lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled
Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.
·
John
and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
·
He
fell for her like his heart was a mob informant, and she was the
·
Even
in his last years, Granddad had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had
been left out so long, it had rusted shut.
·
Shots
rang out, as shots are wont to do.
·
The
plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just
might work.
·
The
young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
·
He
was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck
that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
·
The
ballerina rose gracefully en Pointe and extended one
slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.
·
It
was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.
·
He
was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a
garbage truck backing up.
The
Chickasaw
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