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SHORT STORY - Chapter 1 of a Work in
Progress
CHICKASAW:
The Good Life and Hard Times of
Dr. Christopher Jacques
A Novel by John R. Guthrie
Chapter 1
BOOK I
Lilith McGee
Of Adam’s first wife, Lilith,
it is told
(The witch he loved before the gift of Eve)
That, ere, the snake’s, her sweet tongue could deceive
And her enchanted hair was the first gold.
And still she sits, young while the earth is old,
And subtly of herself contemplative,
Draws men to watch the bright web she can weave,
Til heart and body and life are in its hold.
Dante Gabriel Rosetti
On the Matter of the Red-Headed Nurse
Your love is the poltergeist, the ghost
that haunts the keeping room of memory.
The djinn, insistent, raps upon the door,
your voice entreats that you yet burn for
me.
Gale swept, the polar ice now shifts and cracks.
A tidal wave; its breakers crash and swirl,
sweep bare beachheads of distant
continents.
Your taste, your scent, your speech; red hair cascades
across your carmined
breasts; I am lock-stitched
to you by witching hands whose touch I
know
too well. Your wraith, now petulant
within
the dark and secret counsels of my night,
uncaring, hurls about the treasures there,
leaving but ruin where order once maintained.
John R. Guthrie
Chapter 1: Lilith
McGee
This story, which is centered in Chickasaw County in the year following
the advent of the new millennium, is mostly about a physician named Christopher
Jacques—rhymes with lakes— a family doctor by calling, and Lilith
McGee, a red-headed nurse who was lovely and loving beyond the telling and as
free-spirited as the breezes of springtime. Of necessity, you must know some
portion of the story of some of those whose lives arced across that of
Christopher and Lilith for otherwise this tale would
be left with gaping voids, like a book with half its pages ripped out and
discarded.
The calculus and cosmology of Dr. Jacques emotional center was further
complicated by having experienced a divorce a year and a half before, a divorce
that was as contentious as heavyweight wrestling. Even so, Jacques was a
resilient sort of person, and considered himself to be pretty much recovered
from that unhappy interval. He had, though, resolved never to get overly
involved with any woman, not beyond his and hopefully her immediate physical
needs, and certainly never to marry again. His work, he reminded himself, a
profession which he truly loved, was in itself enough. He was determined to
engage in that work with a priestly devotion. And being so resolved, he worked with
renewed dedication and resultant success so that he even became a bit self-congratulent though, good Southern Baptist that he was, he
knew false pride to be a sin. Yet he couldn’t help but recall that he had,
after, all, escaped the red-clay poverty of his
Deacon or no, though, he saw himself, and in some degree was correct, as
being a purveyor of goodness, health and wisdom to the suffering masses. Then,
early one morning, while making rounds at
***
He approached the nursing station
where she sat alone, working through her charts.
She looked up and spoke. “Good morning, Doctor.”
Chris, disciplined creature that he was, though he
kept that neutral and noncommittal face unchanged, caught his breath, then drew
back almost imperceptibly as he saw a profuse luxury of red hair streaked with
gold like a sunburst, though it was done up primly and pinned in a French twist
behind her head. Alabaster skin. A
scattering of barely perceptible freckles. Hazel eyes with flecks of
gold. Nose finely sculpted and turned up the slightest amount at the tip, ears
as lovely and finely spun as seashells. Jesus. This is the loveliest woman I’ve ever seen. Physically that is. Who
knows what’s on the inside. As if it made any difference to a born-again
bachelor such as myself. And from that moment
onward, Doctor Jacques, he who had resolved never to love any woman more than
was seemly, that he would never to marry again, though he could not and would
not acknowledge it to himself, loved that nurse, even before he knew her name,
more than he had ever dreamt he could love any woman.
Once in a lifetime, a few fortunate men meet a woman like that; a
stranger so artfully done, so lithe and lovely, that she will haunt his memory
forever. Our books of myth and legend, the stories handed down since time began
that tell us who we are, are rich with such tales. When Marc Antony first saw Cleopatra, she was, for better and for
worse, indelibly inscribed on his memory. Their love was so intense that it led
to a common grave. Psyche, whatever her flaws, so affected the young Eros. John
Ridd was so seized in this manner by the exquisite
Lorna Doone.
“Hi, I’m Christopher Jacques.” Chris
considered the woman before him further. A knockout! His caution still was like
that of the ancient mariner upon seeing the mermaid’s beauty. Careful, be formal, business-like. Professional.
Great beauty is often a snare and a delusion. It can conceal more than it
reveals, can distract and mislead. Prudence is a great virtue
“You’re new,” he continued,
allowing himself only the most uptight professional and reserved of smiles.
She smiled back at him. “Well, everybody is once, Doctor Jacques. I’m Lilith McGee.”
Smile like the dawning of a
summer day.
Then, as if remembering herself, she shut that smile off as quickly as it
had illumined the room. Doctor
Christopher Jacques, huh? No
ring on this finger. He seems nice enough, pleasant enough, especially
considering some of the married jerks on the medical staff here that like to
hit on the nurses. Though all of that is of no relevance to
me. Lilith McGee is interested in and will
tolerate only quality
encounters of a professional nature.
“I’ll get your
charts,” she said, put down her pen and stood, her manner as starchy as her
uniform blouse.
Her shoes were boxy
and clunky, both designed for comfort and practicality instead of appearance.
Still, though, Jacques noted that in addition to that exquisite face, she was
an altogether well turned out woman.
“Thanks.” Even if she is of cordial
and professional demeanor, being such a knockout, she’s probably stuck on
herself.
She gathered the charts that had Dr. Jacques on them and they sat off
down the hallway. The smell of disinfectants, of industrial strength cleaning
agents, the hum of the air conditioning, the wavy reflections of the newly
waxed Vinyl tile floors were familiar, comforting for them both. As they made
their way from room to room though, the white stockings she wore swished as she
walked. Nylon?Probably. With spandex woven in for fit. The parent within spoke; hey, guy, keep your mind on the business at
hand, which is attending to sick people, not speculating on the nature and
contents of the nurse’s garments.
She could barely see Christopher as she walked along beside him, arms
heaped with charts. He’s not overly
talkative. Nice enough guy, though. Doesn’t seem gay. Would be a waste if he was. Divorced, I imagine. But all
that’s someone else’s problem.
Jacques remained determinedly silent, even a bit grim perhaps, until they
entered the final patient’s room, skimming the chart as they entered.
Bevels, Blanch H.
84 yo cau fem
Admit Dx, Acute Congestive Heart Failure
Other problems:
Hypertension, controlled
Osteoarthritis
Hearing impairment
Dr. Jacques recalled those other things he knew of Blanch H. Bevels. She
was a widow, lived alone in a small six-room frame house where she and the late
Mr. Bevels, once a welder in the
As Doctor Jaccques and Lilith
entered the room, Jerry Falwell was holding forth at
high volume from the TV bracketed against the wall opposite the foot of the
bed. Something about AIDS being God’s remedy for immorality.
Doctor Jacques, the open chart still in his hand, looked up and smiled at
Mrs. Bevels. “Mrs. Bevels, how are you today?”
She jumped, her
reverie interrupted, then smiled. Her gray hair was mussed from the pillow, her dentures were a bit too white. Her color was
good, though, unlike the pasty gray it had been when she had crashed into the
emergency room, so breathless she couldn’t speak, three days before. He flipped
through her chart as she responded.
“Oh, I am so glad to see you, Doctor Jacques! I’ve just been waiting to
tell you that I’m feeling so much
better. See, I even put a bit of lipstick on this morning. Rouge too. Just in case you send me home today.”
He took her hand and squeezed it. “Mrs. Bevels, you do look even more lovely than usual today. Let’s check a few things before
we decide when you’re leaving, though. You want to stay home once you get
there. May I look at your legs? They were right swollen when you came in.”
She strained toward him and nodded, a look of
expectation and longing on her face, still cupping her ear and straining to
hear. Lilith folded back a flap of the lose-weave
off-white thermal blanket to reveal Mrs. Bevel’s legs. The doctor pressed with
his thumb below her knee to check for any remaining swelling. The skin there
was thin, translucent, papery, sagging, mapped with blue veins.
Though it wrinkled and continued to sag where Dr.
Jacques thumb had pressed, there was no puffiness, this indicating that her
heart was beating more effectively; that her digitalis had slowed and
strengthened her heart, that the bed rest, the diuretics, had done what they a were supposed to.
The doctor looked up, smiling, and said, “Mrs. Bevels, next time I see you it
will be in my office.” He watched for the expected pleased response, but her
face sagged in disappointment. She took a deep breath, sighed, and looked as if
she might weep, then put on a brave face and smiled. Then she spoke loudly,
straining to be heard above Jerry Falwell, “Pizza for
breakfast? How nice.”
Dr. Jacques glanced
at Lilith, who quickly erased the tiny hint of a
smile that played at the corner of that entirely lovely mouth, stepped over,
picked up the remote control and muted church TV. Dr. Jacques recalled her
smile at the desk, a smile that brought Julia Roberts to his mind. Then she was
staring straight ahead, determined not to find humor in Mrs. Bevels’
miscomprehension. Dr. Jacques took the patient’s thin hand, age-spotted and
cool, in his again. Shaking his head, smiling at her, Dr. Jacques said, “No,
Mrs. Bevels, not pizza. You’re going home.”
She took a deep breath, placed her other hand over
his. Looking as pleased as a well-fed tabby, she said, “Doc,
that sure is good news. This bed is so hard I might as well have slept
on the floor. Of course, I love all you doctors. Nurses too,” she added quickly
glancing at Lilith. “You’ve all been just as sweet as
you could be. But please, Honey, I’ll even fix both of you a cup of coffee for
you if y’all will just come see me at my place from now on.”
“Ms. Bevels, let’s hope I can do that," Jacques replied.
After Christopher and Lilith left Mrs. Bevel’s
room and continued down the hall, Dr. Jacques murmured in Mrs. Bevel’s high
voice, still looking straight ahead, “Pizza for breakfast. How
nice.” He saw Lilith glance at him sternly
from the corner of his eye. Then she smiled, chuckled a little in spite of her
determined somberness, but quickly added, “Hey Doc, she’s a sweet woman.
Hearing impairment is not a joke.”
Dr. Jacques looked at her. She was serious, but again a smile played at
the corners of her mouth anyway.
“Right on both counts,” he replied. “But it’s a charming concept, really,
breakfast pizza. You a pizza fan?”
“Not really,” she replied. “More like, maybe, tofu. Tofu
quesadillas.”
Doctor Jacques responded with mock concern. “How very
strange. Where are you from?”
He looked at her; eyes azure, specks of turquoise.
Now he’s really sorta cute. Any other time, this would be great, but not
now. Not with the other crap I’ve got to deal with. To Dr. Jacques’ dismay, Lilith McGee, R.N.,
B.S.N., was unsmiling again and dreadfully professional. Her gaze was direct,
betraying nothing. “
“I was born here. Actually out in the county, up closer
to the mountains. Swore I’d never come back, but after residency, for a
lot of reasons, I did. You like it here?”
She hesitated then replied, “in some ways. It’s
not
Dr. Jacques smiled at this. “No, it sure isn’t
Lilith and Christopher
continued to chat as they completed patient rounds. Once back at the nurse’s
station, they began entering notes in the patient’s charts. Doctor Jacques
finished writing, and looked over at Lilith. She was
still busy, intent on the nursing notes she was entering in her precise and
clear penmanship on a patient chart. with her nursing notes. Placing his pen in the vest pocket
of his clinic coat, he stood to leave, his chair sliding back on the floor as
he did so. She glanced up briefly, “Have a good day, Doctor Jacques,” and
returned quickly to her charting. He hesitated, looked at her. I shouldn’t do this, this is the wrong time
to do this, but I’m going to do this, because she is one exceptional woman and
she’s probably just waiting for me to ask anyway.
So against his better
judgment, Dr. Jacques heard himself saying, “I don’t know any place that serves
tofu quesadillas, but I bet we could find something worth eating if you’d care
to do dinner sometime.”
She quit writing
for a moment, still looking at her chart, just long enough for Dr. Jacques to
feel like fidgeting, then looked up at him and said, “Doctor Jacques, I’ve
enjoyed talking with you, and I appreciate your offer. Your patients obviously
like you a lot too. But I’m taking some courses at the university for my M.S.N.
I have to study. Also, please, it’s nothing personal, but I really try to keep
my personal and my professional life separate. I’m glad to help you on rounds
any time, though, of course.”
“Oh well, too bad,”
he said, trying to keep it light and show how much this was as nothing to him.
“Have a good day.”
Yet even as he
spoke, his inner voice said something else completely; What a fucking ice queen. She’s probably got more social life than she can
handle anyway. I should have known, just by looking at her. She’s too much of a
knockout. A prima donna. Then maybe I just screwed it up. Seemed too eager. Should’ve waited a
while.
But even so, he
heard himself saying aloud in that pleasant baritone of his, in the most
courteous way, “Well, I’d better be going,” smiling all the while. Raising his
hand in a sort of half salute, he turned to leave, walking down the corridor
that led to the parking lot. Yet his inner scold continued; not surprising, with her good looks, that
she really is stuck on herself. I should be glad I found that out right away.
So what? There are plenty of fish in the sea. Not that all of the fish that
good looking. But looks aren’t everything. And he consoled himself further
by considering Lilith McGee’s character. silently, Anyway, I don’t
know anything about her character. That’s what counts in a person. Character!
But if I’d waited a while, she probably would’ve accepted.
Once in his car,
before backing out of the parking space, he wrenched the rearview mirror down
so that he was staring back at himself, searching for some previously
undetected flaw. He saw himself staring back, mid-thirties, brown hair, tending
toward blond on top. Not thinning much at
all, really. Plenty of nose, no deficiency there.
Broad face, a bit flat because of the Scottish input to his French Huguenot
ancestry. A scar beneath his lower lip from a Marine Corps bayonet drill when
he was barely 18. A face with character. Character certainly trumps movie-star good
looks, no matter the gender. To bad the Lilith McGees of this world don’t realize that! He readjusted
the mirror, backed out, and headed for his clinic. But what a smile that Lilith McGee had.
Chastity, a soggy
tissue crumpled in both hands now as she sat on the end of the exam table,
concluded. “So, Doc, I told Randy and he left the next morning, and didn’t tell
anybody where he was going. Some say he joined the army. Some say he went to
Texas ‘cause he had folks there, but nobody knew much about them, and some say
that he went back to Tennessee where he went to college before he came here.
And Doc, everybody’s so mad now. Really, major, big time
mad.”
“I guess so, after
what happened, and him abandoning you and the congregation, too. They should be angry at him.”
“No, Doc, you don’t understand. It’s me they’re mad at. Mama
is too. She’s said, more than once since I got…since all this happened, ‘I oughtta run you off.’ She’s so mean now.” It occurred to
Dr. Jacques as the tear-streaked and desolate young woman before him spoke that
her Mama never had been all that good to her.
“Now she hardly speaks,” Chastity continued, “unless it’s to
call me a little fool or a Jezebel or worse. The Board of Deacons called me in
to meet with them last Saturday. They said a good preacher was hard to get out
in the country, and that they had a perfectly good little preacher boy until I
started fooling with him. They read to me, right from the Bible, where it says
that a whore is a deep ditch; a strange woman is a narrow pit. They said I
can’t come back to church until I come down in front of the congregation and
ask them all for forgiveness. Then they’d vote and see about letting me come
back.”
Doctor Jacques, brow wrinkled now, spoke, “Chas, what did
your mom say when she found out all this?”
“She’s the one that took me over there for them to talk to
in the first place. She was standing right there, nodding and a-mening up a storm. That’s when she first told me she oughtta run me off, Doc, right there in front of the board
of deacons. None of the deacons said a thing to that. They looked like they
thought it might be a good idea.”
Nurse Jolley was biting her lower
lip, eyes brimming, a worried look on her face. Dr.
Jacques took a deep breath and let it out before saying, “So what’d you say to
all that, Chastity?”
“Doc, I apologize
for saying this in front of you, but I pretty much quit crying then, and I got
my breath. And then I told them they could kiss my sinful little ass.”
Dr. Jacques frowned
ever so slightly, biting his lower lip, for being disrespectful toward a a diaconate, even one that was small of heart and
mean-spirited, even one from a small and remote Baptist church, even under
these circumstances, was not in his repertoire. Nurse Jolley
though, broke into a grin and held up her hands as if to applaud, but glanced
at Doctor Jacques, thought better of it and clasped them in front of her.
Chastity concluded, “Mama drew back like she was going to slap me, which is one
of her favorite things to do anyway, but she wasn’t quick enough. I turned
around and left real quick, them all red in the face
and puffed up like toad frogs. Soon as we got home, Mama made me get down on my
knees and pray for forgiveness.” Shaking her head, she continued, “Then she
kept saying she oughta throw me out. Doc, if she
does, if she runs me off, I don’t have no place to
go.”
***
Christopher went back to his office in the corner of the
clinic to gather up the paperwork that was going home with him. He sat at his
desk, checking the appointment sheet for the next day. That
done, he leaned back, crossed his arms over his chest and looked up at the
picture on the wall opposite his desk. It was a limited edition print of
the evening parade at Headquarters Marine Corps at 8th and I Streets
in
It was nearly dark, the streetlights flickering on. The
parking lot was cold enough that the breeze chilled and rouged his cheeks,
urging him to walk briskly to the purple-red, amaranth the color was called, Jaguar Vanden
Plas with the initials C. M. J. on the license plate.
He got in, started the engine, switched the radio on and rolled toward home.
The announcer read the weather then segued into a honeyed and urgent appeal for
donations. Dr. Jacques felt a flicker of irritation. He was too tired for
anyone, even the genial disembodied voice of the Public Radio host, to ask him
for anything more on this long day. He reached over and pressed the CD button,
then PLAY as the car pulled into the street. Toccata and Fugue in D Minor, the
Bach powerhouse for organ, a favorite, thundered from the speakers. He quickly
punched the reject button, and taking a Willie Nelson disc from behind the
car’s windshield visor, he shoved it in the slot, then
backed off on the volume. Willie revved up in a shower of mellow guitar licks
and crooned in a voice as honest and plaintive as the nightingale’s cry
something about a king in a cold and lonely castle.
He thought of the
red-headed nurse again, reminded himself that she was a lost cause And what do I care? He turned his thoughts
to Chastity, seeing her again in his mind’s eye, pathos personified, sitting on the end of the exam table. What was she thinking, to get involved with her Preacher? What was the young
preacher thinking? Of course, what did they know? Good Baptist that he wanted
to be, it was still troubling to Chris that sex, at least in any realistic
detail, was pretty much a forbidden topic here in the schools and elsewhere. As
if you just don’t talk about it, it’ll just go away. Kids are told in Sunday
school and elsewhere “just say no” and everything will be OK. Yet “just say
no,” didn’t work in the Garden of Eden or hardly any time since. Everything in
the libidinally charged and hormonally hyped bodies
of the young, though, was commanding “just say YES,” for that is Mother Nature’s way of continuing the species. So
the
It took him eight minutes of slow driving to reach the
tri-level ranch on a hillside in a development that local wags termed Pill Hill
because of the number of physicians that resided there. Disembarking from his
car, he twisted the key in the kitchen door and stepped inside.
Theophilus “Theo” Messinger,
the Doc’s houseman, was there, putting away the last few dishes from the
dishwasher. He stepped over and took the Doc’s briefcase as he greeted him and
turned to the kitchen counter, picked up the Austerity newspaper that had been
thrown in the driveway that morning and handed it to Christopher. Doc noted the
nodules on his finger joints, the stigmata of Theo’s arthritis. He had first
met Theo in the emergency room on one of Doc’s on-call days. Chris had looked
him over, a graying, seventyish black man of compact
build and great dignity holding his right wrist with his left hand.
“Hello Theophilus Messinger. I’m Dr. Christopher
Jacques. What brings you to the emergency room today?”
“Doc, I
didn’t sleep a bit all night with the misery that’s set up in this wrist. Never had nothing like it before.”
“I looks like it hurts,” Chris had replied. “Anyone in your
family, your blood kin have gout?”
“Sure
enough my daddy did. He was a farmer. Called it the ‘goutch,’
Doc. Mama’d try to get him to say gout, ‘cause she was a school teacher and said everything just so.
Daddy finally said, call it what you want Miss Messinger.
It still hurts like hades.” Theo smiled at the
recollection as he continued to massaged his wrist.
Fluid
from the red and swollen wrist joint, viewed through a microscope with a
polarizing filter revealed the tell-tale crystals of uric acid that signified
gout. Jacques injected the joint with an
anti-inflammatory, wrote him two prescriptions and told Theophilus
he’d get immense relief by morning. “You need to follow up with your regular
doctor,” he added. Theophilus adjusted his
gold-rimmed glasses on the bridge of his nose, then said, “Don’t have one.
Hadn’t ever much needed one until now. You taking on new patients Doc?”
“I’d be
delighted,” Jacques said,
She’d
fired the housekeeper before she left. “But why?”he’d implored in one of the last
epochal verbal combats of that ill-fated marriage. “Because, asshole,” she’d
hissed back at him, “you have time for everybody but me.”
Christopher
had expected the usual when he placed the ad for “housekeeper, live in or live
out;” a middle-aged woman from
--End, Chapter 1, Chickasaw--
The
Chickasaw
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